![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.110pounds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/IMG_1125.jpg\")
<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\nAnd had an ah-ha moment! Yes, I came to this realization early in 2021. But this graphic summed up what I’ve been feeling this year so brilliantly, I needed to share. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
2021 has been a year of healing for me. I have been trying to change my relationship with food and exercise<\/a>. Earlier in 2021 I came to the realization at how restrictive I’ve been for so long and I asked myself if that was how I wanted to live. Did I want to be on my deathbed someday, counting my calories and still trying to lose weight? When I visited my 99 year old grandmother last spring, a few months before she died, I was absolutely shocked at the body negativity she had about herself. She’d made a joke about having her picture taken because of her weight. This was a pretty big wake up call to me–did I want to be 99 years old and STILL DIETING?<\/p>\n\n\n\n No.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Over the beginning of 2021, I stopped counting my calories and tracking everything in MyFitnessPal. I’ve done it for 15+ years. (In the beginning it was just logging calories in a notebook, then I switched to the app.) During my keto phase, I was obsessively tracking and monitoring carb counts. When I stopped tracking, it was a little bit scary and weird. And for a few months I was still counting calories in my head<\/strong>. I just wasn’t logging it. It took a few months, but I eventually stopped doing it in my head. <\/p>\n\n\n\n And what happened? Did I gain weight? No. Did I finally have some MENTAL PEACE? Hell yes! It was like a huge relief off my chest. I hadn’t realized just how much mental energy counting my calories took. Logging everything. Weighing food. Cutting portion sizes. Restricting food if I go over my “calories for the day.” Over exercising to “earn” food.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I have a kid now, who hears everything we talk about and I am VERY conscious about how I talk about food, body, body image, body size. I am doing my very best to teach him nutrition and listening to his body, but not restriction (which is hard). I try to shield him from this stuff as much as I can. No fat phobia talk. No diet talk, etc. And now we are having a girl soon and I am going to try even harder to protect her from this stuff, too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n