sushi

The First Few Days

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We got checked into our recovery room, which was much smaller than the delivery room. I was having some weakness in my left leg still from the epidural so the first few hours of recovery were pretty rough. I needed assistance to get out of bed and walk to the bathroom otherwise my left leg would give out. Thankfully that didn’t last too long.

In our room we met the pediatrician and nurse that would be taking care of us that day. More testing for both mom and baby. Logan was doing great and everything tested well and no jaundice issues.

We probably should have slept right then and there but I think we were too busy staring at the new little man in our life to think about sleeping.

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I mean really, who can sleep when this precious thing needs cuddles??

The lactation nurse came and helped out a bit. The pediatrician came in and gave Logan an exam. He is a little tongue-tied. I was concerned about this and thought it might be best to take care of the issue while we were in the hospital, instead of waiting a few weeks and suffering but the doctor didn’t seem too concerned about it and thought it might be ok, that he’d latch and suck alright. I wish I had listened to my intuition and been more forceful because it turned out he did have an issue that made breast feeding difficult (which we didn’t realize until day 3 at home).

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That first night in the hospital with him was rough. We had a few guests come visit and meet him. My mom drove down from Seattle and my cousin Anna stopped by for a short visit. Michael’s mom and stepdad came by to take Michael out to lunch and meet the baby. I was worn out from labor, birth, recovery, lack of sleep and hormones and yet…I struggled to sleep.

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I sent Michael home for a few hours to take care of the animals and take a nap at home so he could come back to the hospital and be with Logan while I slept. New mom paranoia — I didn’t want to close my eyes in case something happened. So I couldn’t rest! I’d nod off and he’d make a noise and I’d jump awake to make sure he was ok.

I ordered some food — a cheese quesadilla, coleslaw, fruit, a hardboiled egg, juice and more lemon bars. And Michael brought me a chicken and spinach salad for dinner. I ate everything. I was so hungry!

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Michael came back to the hospital that night around 10:30pm and brought me a PBJ sandwich (so delicious) which I ended up eating at 2am. I still couldn’t sleep much. It was anxiety for sure.

I was glad the nurses were there on call for questions. Some of my questions were incredibly dumb, I’m sure. I mean Logan got the hiccups and they were lasting like 10 minutes and it made me nervous. Which is silly. They are just hiccups. But I was glad the nurse was there to help. She asked if he’d had hiccups inside me and yep–pretty much every day! The nurses also helped with breast feeding, which was nice, and showed us how to swaddle. They were pros at it.

The next day we did more tests on both of us and then did all the stuff for getting discharged.

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I was wheeled out in a chair and Michael carried Logan out to the car. There was a moment when we left where it was like — I can’t believe we’re leaving the hospital! We are now parents and in charge of this little guy. SCARY! Thankfully it was a short car ride home and Logan was great. It felt so good to be home in familiar surroundings and seeing the animals again.


Fat Kitty and Bella have been FANTASTIC! They are so good and well-behaved around the baby. I’d been worried for nothing. Fat Kitty, who normally hates babies and small children and hisses and then hides, did none of that and has curious but cautious and doesn’t seem bothered by the baby. Bella immediately went into protective mode and checks on Logan all the time. One time I had the baby in another room and Michael said Bella went over to his little empty bassinet and nudged it with her nose to see if he was in there. So cute. I’m glad they are doing alright with the new addition.

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The first night home from the hospital = SUSHI and BEER! <3 YAY! It was the best meal ever!

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My mom stayed with us for a few days when we first got home and it was a humongous help. I wasn’t sleeping much and getting pretty frazzled from exhaustion. She did so much to help us–cleaning, cooking, taking the baby so we could sleep, going to the store. It was seriously a life saver.

 

My dad has been in Arizona for awhile and he drove two days to Oregon to meet Logan. He stayed for the weekend and got to spend some quality time with his grandson. 🙂

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The first week was a hard adjustment but by his 6th day we kind of had a routine going and things were getting better.

Hopes & Fears

It’s hard to believe the time is almost upon us. I think it’s normal to be fearful and hopeful at the same time. It seems like this pregnancy has both zipped by AND dragged like I was walking through quick sand. Each week seemed to last for-ever! But at the same time it seemed like the pregnancy was going at lightening speed. I blinked and all of a sudden I was in the 3rd trimester. How did that happen?!

After years and years of hoping and fantasizing about a little bundle of joy, and months of gestating, I’m both READY and not ready for him to be here. Part of me is already a little sad that he won’t be inside me moving and kicking around just for me. 🙂

In preparation for our birth class at the hospital I had to fill out a questionnaire and one of the questions was what are we most worried about. For me it was the birth process. For Michael his biggest fear was that I was going to go into labor at an inconvenient time. Meaning–at work, or on the bus, or somewhere where he can’t get to me quickly. That is definitely a fear! I do not want my water to break at work, or on the bus, or to go into labor downtown when our hospital is 10+ miles away. Ideal scenario would be it would start at home, where I am comfortable and only 5 minutes away from the hospital!

So here are some things on my mind lately. Hopes and fears both.

Birth!

Like I’ve said before, I hadn’t given it much thought about the being pregnant part, I always thought about the baby part…and I definitely did not give the BIRTH part much thought either. Probably because it sounds terrifying so I just don’t think about it. 🙂

I’m definitely scared of being ripped in two. But at the same time, I’m scared of ending up having to have a C-section. So I just try not to think about the whole thing and hope for the best. I am definitely not a “must have natural childbirth” kind of person. Whatever happens, works for me. I will go with the flow and see what happens, go with the advice of the doctors and midwives who are the experts. I do not have a “birth plan” other than “give birth to a healthy baby and recover”. Birth plan DONE!

I often skipped the birth chapters of pregnancy books. I was like “I’ll read that later….” I also skipped all the horror stories in pregnancy chat boards. It’s crazy how many people wanted to tell me their HORROR STORIES when they found out I was pregnant. Why? I don’t want to know every worst case scenario that could possible happen…Really, people.

Baby Boy will be super late.

Definitely have some fears that he’s going to be late. I’m already dreading the comments from people who think they are being cute and funny when they say to pregnant women “you’re still pregnant?! Why haven’t you hatched yet” blah blah blah. Not cute. Not funny. NO pregnant woman wants to get grief from people because her baby hasn’t arrived right on time. Just shuuush!

Other than that I haven’t given it too much thought because really, can I control when he decides to arrive? Not really. So why stress.

 

Breastfeeding

My hope is that breastfeeding goes alright. This is really important to me and I want it to go well. I’ve read a little bit about it but not a ton because really, every baby is different. There’s definitely some fears around it, again–the people with their horror stories–but overall I’m hopeful and excited about it. I’m hopeful that learning how to use the breast pump I got from the doctor is easy.

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Sushi!!!!

My hope is that my first post-partum meal is sushi and a giant glass of wine! Take note, Michael! 🙂 I cannot wait for that spicy tuna roll.

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Milestones and Learning

I am SO excited about experiencing everything with the baby! I remember the days when I used to babysit and it was crazy how every week they were different little creatures who had learned something new and were growing and so curious about everything. That is so exciting and I’m looking forward to that.

I’m excited to teach our baby things. Read to him. Take him on hikes to explore nature. I’m excited about all of it! And starting to feel impatient. 🙂