Three Years and Counting

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out.
~ by Elizabeth Bowen (1899-1973) ~

Michael and I are celebrating our three year anniversary. The “official” date is a little fuzzy. We were friends for months before we started dating and really we just decided on June 19th being our anniversary. It was close enough. June 19th three years ago was the night before I had surgery to remove the lump from my breast. Michael took me out to dinner to a fancy restaurant (Eleni’s Greek Restaurant in Sellwood). I got dressed up and we had our first REAL date. I was scared that the surgery would be painful, I was scared the lump would turn out to be cancer (it wasn’t), I was scared I’d have a big scar, I was scared I might not wake up. Michael was the sweetest, kindest guy and he tried to distract me from my fears and reassure me that everything was okay.

First Anniversary

For our first anniversary we spent the weekend in Stevenson, Washington. I booked us a romantic little cabin right on the Columbia River, walking distance from the Walking Man Brewery. It was a log cabin with a rustic interior and jacuzzi tub. The cabin was perfect–except for one thing. We quickly found out WHY the cabin was less than $80 a night. It was right next to the train tracks. And yes, there was a train that went by almost hourly. We should have known that when we saw the “complimentary” ear plugs by the bedside.

Either way, it was still a nice weekend. We ate breakfast on the deck next to the blooming jasmine flowers and we drove to the Maryhill Winery.

We hiked on the Columbia River and then hiked Eagle Creek and saw a deer. It was a good first anniversary.

Second Anniversary

The second anniversary was a bit better. I booked us a room at a very cute bed and breakfast in Hood River. The breakfast was delicious, our room had an amazing jacuzzi tub in it.

We ate good food, sampled beers, went wine tasting and enjoyed the gardens in the Fruit Loop.

We did several hikes in Hood River and also near Multnomah Falls.

We did a bike ride through Hood River and got to see gorgeous views of the Gorge from the trail.

Last year’s anniversary weekend was one of my favorite vacations that we’ve taken together. The weather was absolutely perfect and we did so many fun things! I couldn’t have asked for a better weekend.

Third Anniversary

So what are we doing this year for our 3rd anniversary? I have NO idea! Michael is planning it this year and it’s a surprise. I have no idea where we are going or what to pack. I love surprises! No matter what it is, it will be fun!

See ya guys later! 🙂

When Workouts Cause Conflict

On yesterday’s post about couple’s fitness, Carbzilla asked:

“This is such a great post and excellent timing because I was going to ask you if Michael ever got jealous of your gym time (but then that seemed kinda personal).”

It’s an excellent question! I asked Michael if it was too personal and he said no.

When I first started trying to lose the weight, I lived alone and I wasn’t seeing anyone at the time. My time was mine and I could spend it any way I wanted–one of the perks of being a single gal. 😉 I had a lot of free time so after work I started swimming or using the small gym at the community center. My hard work paid off and I lost weight.

Well what happened when I met Michael?

I’d lost about 80 pounds when I met him. I had 20 or so to go and he was very supportive of my goals. At the same time my time was suddenly not all mine. Suddenly there was someone in my life that demanded attention. When I say “demanded attention” it’s not a bad thing. Relationships take hard work on both sides and we MUST make time for each other while balancing our own hobbies and goals. That is definitely something that Michael and I see eye to eye on.

So here I was, a no longer single gal, that suddenly had to figure out how to balance my time in a smart way. I fell in love with this guy:

And I WANTED to spend time with him. Lots of time! He wanted to spend time with me. I would go to the pool right after work, then go over to Michael’s house and eat dinner, spend the night. Or after I worked out at the gym, he’d come over to my house for dinner. That’s how our relationship was for a long time.

As our relationship progressed that time was eventually every day. Weekends were hard because Sundays were always one of my designated swim days. I had a strong desire to get to the pool, but I was conflicted about not spending every moment available with him.

There were times it caused conflict. I remember many Sundays when Michael would try to entice me to skip the pool and stay at his place watching movies… But for the most part Michael has ALWAYS been supportive of me and my goals. He knows how important fitness is to me.

After we moved in together it got much easier to balance everything in our lives. On the weekends I workout in the mornings so he’ll go golfing with friends and when I get back we do things together. Or, like I wrote about yesterday, we workout together by going for a bike ride or hike.

When it comes to Races, Michael’s been supportive for the most part. My first race he was supportive. My second race, he was not.

Shamrock 8k 2010

He fully admits that he was not into it, he didn’t want to go downtown in the freezing cold and stand there while I ran for an hour. He was cranky, I felt his crankiness as we drove downtown–I was nervous about my race and wanted him to be supportive instead of miserable. Once the race started, Michael says that he got pumped up. The energy of so many people running was contagious. He got excited about seeing the fast runners cross the finish line so soon and when I crossed the finish line I saw a big smile on his face! AND when he experienced the excitement as a racer himself (Reach the Beach) his opinion completely changed. When Hood to Coast came around he was my #1 Fan. 🙂

Hood to Coast 2010

Once in awhile my workout schedule can cause conflicts in our relationship. For example, if I’m starting to get sick (like I am now) I tend to listen to my body before I just cancel a workout. If I’m feeling okay, I will still workout. This often frustrates Michael. He wants me to take it easy, stay in bed, not push myself. I know that he’s just worried about my health. I just want to listen to my body. It TELLS me when I’m too sick to workout.

I think that we have a good relationship balance. We each spend time with friends, we spend time together, I get to workout whenever I feel like it, but we compromise often to make sure we’re both happy. I can’t say that there will never be another conflict but I think we handle it well.

QUESTION: Does your fitness routine ever cause conflict in your relationship? How do you handle it and how do you balance your relationship time with your personal/workout time?