Dec 022014
 

progress

When I got back from Hawaii I weighed myself. If you saw my recent post, Weight Loss is Humbling, I admitted that the original weigh in hadn’t been accurate and I was heavier than I thought. I admit, it depressed me. I cried a little bit at the shock; I was angry at myself for letting it get that bad; I was kicking myself for not weighing myself EVERY WEEK since getting back. Had I done that, I would have caught the inaccuracy quicker and probably could have righted the ship sooner, too.

After the shock on the scale I started doing a few things:

I measured my food. Even salad dressing. For years I eye-balled a lot of stuff and it worked for a long time. But clearly I need to measure right now.

I ate fruits and veggies for snacks. I was already eating fruit as a morning snack during the week. But instead of some of the other not-so-healthy snacks I had been eating, I switched to eating raw vegetables and hummus (the hummus was portioned control packets from Costco).

I ate lean proteins, vegetables and salads for dinner. I told Michael that I wasn’t going to be eating pizza or “unhealthy” things for awhile. While we only ate pizza once a week (usually Friday nights) and it was Papa Murphy’s deLite pizza (low in calories), I didn’t want to eat a food that used to be a trigger for me. Besides, there are better choices I can make while I’m losing this weight.

I limited alcohol. Being on vacation I got a bit lazy with my liquid calories. Now I’m limiting it to Friday and Saturday nights only, and 1 glass of red wine. It’s not a huge deal to limit that for me but where I struggle is social events. We went to a Halloween party and it was difficult to not drink, for example. I wanted to have fun like everyone else!

I’m trying to limit candy. My downfall, always. Candy is where I struggle. Chocolate. Candy. Halloween candy. Baked goods at work. Sucks! But I’m doing my best to limit what I take in.

No Nog! At least until December 1st. I love eggnog. I know it’s an either love it or hate it kind of thing but I love it and usually buy it when it first arrives in the grocery store–somewhere around mid-November. This year I am waiting until December. I usually buy the light version but still, that’s a lot of calories. Waiting is a good thing. It will still be there…. :)

I’m also weighing myself once a week, even though the natural fluctuations on the scale stress me out. After seeing the shocking number on the scale, I weighed myself four days later and saw a small loss, so that was encouraging.

More Progress

Week One – Lost .08 pounds

Week Two – Didn’t weigh myself (PMSing!)

Week Three – Lost 1.8 pounds

Week Four – Sick! Weight stayed the same though

Week Five – Up 1 pound

Week Six – Thanksgiving…whomp whomp

PSA: Do not weigh yourself the day after Thanksgiving. For several reasons…first, it will just be discouraging. That can lead to feeling like giving up. Second, it might not be an accurate weight. Give it a few days, THEN step on that scale.

I’ve also been going to the Warrior Room consistently since being back from Hawaii. Getting back has helped me a LOT with my Runner’s Knee issues. The hard part is that I tend to gain weight at the Warrior Room. People tell me not to worry about that because it’s muscle, it’s my body composition changing, the number on the scale doesn’t mean I’m fat…blah blah blah. I’m still concerned about the number on the scale and dismissing it as “it’s muscle!” doesn’t really make me feel any better. So sure, while my body has become more muscular and I’m seeing some definition in areas I’m still focused on getting that number back under 150 pounds and I’d like to see my muffin top disappear.

One thing I noticed was that I think part of my problem coming back from vacation was I didn’t make the mental shift to “losing.” I’d been in maintenance mode for so long and could really eat whatever I wanted (in moderation) and not see a blip on the scale, that when I started to try and lose weight I wasn’t creating a deficit with my calories. That’s required for LOSING weight and I was comfortable back in maintenance mode where I ate all of my calories. Nope, nope, nope. That’s not how it works. A major DUH moment but yeah, you have to make that mental shift to LOSING.

This process is going much slower this time around. Stay tuned. I hope the next update is a little more positive!

 

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Apr 212014
 

Back in February I posted T is for Truth where I admitted I have been struggling this winter. There were a lot of reasons (excuses) for the weight gain–I’ve been more sick this winter than any other (getting a cold/sinus infection three times!), I took a month off from weight lifting due to an injury, the typical holiday eating packed on some pounds, there was some stressful bullshit going on (those issues have since been resolved) and that led to some stress eating. I also changed my birth control–which cleared up my acne but caused some very unfortunately weight gain.

I was up to 149. 1 pound from goal weight. That buffer area is important to me. I like having some wiggle room between my current weight and my goal weight–it allows me to indulge once in awhile and not see the scales tip. I usually fluctuate between 144-146. That 149 was scary. I decided I needed to get my act together.

I wasn’t feeling good about myself and that was making me not feel good about everything else in my life. It sounds whiny, I know, but feeling uncomfortable in my skin colors how I see the rest of the world/go through my day. I wish I was stronger and didn’t let the self-esteem issues effect me in such a way. But when none of your clothes fit, it’s hard NOT to look in the mirror and feel disdain. Then Lori at Finding Radiance confessed that her self-esteem had taken a beating lately. It was nice to read that another maintainer was feeling similarly and it was comforting in a way.

I cleaned up my diet in a number of ways. I reduced or eliminated the liquid calories I was consuming. Having one glass of wine on a Friday and Saturday night is sufficient. Drinking during the week isn’t necessary and just packs on the pounds. I also took a look at my sugar habit. It was a little out of control this winter! I finally finished that tub of Nutella (it only took me 4 months) so that temptation is out of the house! I’ve stopped buying ice cream and other desserts. I do have dessert but I’m trying to make better choices and not eat it every night.

Last week I weighed myself for the monthly check-in. I was anxious. I’d been doing well with my food for weeks but my pants were STILL TOO TIGHT. Like skintight. I didn’t have high hopes. I was happily surprised! I’d lost a few pounds; weighing in at 147. I’ll take it. Progress is progress, even if it’s just a little bit.

I’m confused and frustrated that my pants don’t fit. I’m only 3-4 pounds higher than I was this time last year when my pants all fit. I find it hard to believe that 4 pounds could really make such a difference that my pants won’t button now. What is up with that??

set and reach goal concept

For awhile I will try to post once a week discussing my progress and making goals. I think I’ve gotten out of my funk and I’m ready to get serious.

This Week’s Goals

ACCURATELY track my calories each day–this means all the bites, nibbles, sips, snacks. It also means not lying to myself when I KNOW I ate more than one serving of something…

Drink at least 3 water bottles of water at work in addition to the water I drink at home and at the gym.

Strive to leave 200 calories left for each day in my “bank.” On days I work out I do eat more calories and I often justify the extra treats. Many days I have less than 100 calories leftover for the day. That’s not creating any kind of deficit. I think 200 calories is a good number to be left for the day.

how-to-set-goals
I will check in next week!

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