breastfeeding

What I’m Doing Lately

My workout schedule has been a little wonky this week! Last Saturday they were predicting a little bit of snow so I got to the gym early and thankfully got in my workout. I stopped at the grocery store for essentials (chips and beer and baby food) on the way home and it was a MADHOUSE. I’ve never been to the grocery store when it was that nuts. I got home just as the snow was starting to get heavy and spent the rest of the day playing with Logan, watching Netflix, Michael did some painting…it was good.

Sunday I got up to not much snow, the rain overnight had melted it, but instead everything was a sheet of ice! I tried to go to the pool but decided it was a bad idea and turned around and went home. Instead, I worked out on the bike trainer in the living room. I did 35 minutes and burned 290 calories.

The weather improved and melted off. Fast forward to Tuesday. They were predicting more snow. I got to the gym after work (a little later than I planned) and ran 2.15 miles on the treadmill, watching the freezing rain/hail start to fall. I decided to cut my workout short and head home early because I had my car and not the Subaru and my car is NOT snow/ice capable.

I was bummed my workout was cut short. I had planned on running 2.5 miles and then doing some weight machines, but it was a smart move to just go home.

Dinner:

Chicken thigh, sauteed kale with bacon, cottage cheese and a beer! Dinner was around 700 calories. It was snowing a little bit. Michael and I watched an episode of Narcos and it snowed probably about an inch or so. We went to bed, pretty sure we weren’t going to be going to work on Wednesday…

….and woke up Wednesday to this:

SNOW DAY!

Kind of hard to tell but we have a TON of broken tree limbs. We’re going to have a lot of damage to fix once this is gone.

I know people reading this in the midwest are laughing at us, but this is a lot of snow for Oregonians! (And all over Oregon, there’s tons of snow accumulation!)

At like 4am we woke up to a big crashing noise. Michael was up in the kitchen making a bottle for Logan and I thought he dropped something in the kitchen, it was that loud! But it turns out it was the above giant tree in our yard and the sound was huge branches cracking and breaking. Scary!

8 years ago when Michael and I were first dating, I got snowed in at his house. I went to his house for dinner one Friday night after swimming and woke up Saturday morning to several feet of snow and it kept snowing–and we ended up being snowed in together for about 5 days!!! It was a true test of our new relationship. LOL Obviously, we lived through it!

So Wednesday we woke up to about 6 inches of snow and it was still falling. I fixed myself breakfast:

Scrambled eggs topped with cheese and hot sauce, toasted English muffin with cream cheese and avocado. Hot coffee and EmergenC. Logan had his breakfast:

And once he went down for a nap I got in my home workout.

Snowed In Workout:

Warm-up

Inchworms – 8

Pushups – 10×2

Squats – 10×3

KB swings with 20lbs – 12×4

Mountainclimbers – 30×4

Side Lunges – 10×2 each

Toe touches with ball – 15×4

Glute bridges – 15×4

Knee Raises – 10×2

Overhead triceps – 10×3

Biceps curls – 10×3

Cobra stretches – 10×3

V-Ups – 15×4

Biceps curls with strap – 10×4

Stretches – yoga and PT stretches

Foam Roller

End Result: 311 calories burned! I’ll take it!

I did some stuff around the house and then had soup and crackers for lunch. Spent the rest of the day kind of tinkering around the house. I think we were all feeling a little stir-crazy! I made Michael sit down with me and watch some of Twin Peaks. Can you believe he’s never seen it?!

Dinner was steak, sauteed peppers and a glass of this lovely wine:

Thursday I got up and weighed myself…to discover I’ve lost 2 pounds! It was quite the surprise. I was noticing that certain clothes lately have felt a little loose, which is why I got on the scale. I’ve started the weaning process and that’s the only thing I can think that might have helped me lose some pounds because I’ve been doing all the same things I’ve been doing for months…

We had breakfast and then I took Bella for a walk in the snow!

It was sunny and cool but not too cold to trek through the snow. Bella was LOVING it! And so was I, honestly, after being trapped in the house for a few days.

The snow was so beautiful! I walked around the neighborhood with B. I stuck with the snow because it was easier to walk in than the frozen car tracks. It was quiet and relaxing.

I am happy with my calorie burn for a trek through the snowy neighborhood:

Thursday workout done! The rest of the day is going to include some soup, tea and maybe a nap!

 

Getting Serious

I loved this article so much. If you have the time, give it a read: How to Feel Better About Not Being as Good as You “Should” Be. It definitely speaks to where I am at currently.

Life is a lot different these days. In some ways it’s the same as it was pre-baby. Work, chores, life, gym, friends and family. It’s similar in routine, we just have a little life with us now. 🙂

But I’m different. My priorities have shifted. My body is different, obviously. And it’s hard to come to terms with that. I was making some progress with weight loss this summer. I lost about 4-ish pounds and was feeling re-energized and motivated.

Then that plateaued. I stalled out. Then I ran into some issues. Sure I could make excuses but the facts are: I was stressed out about Logan starting daycare and did some stress eating. I regained a few of those pounds I’d lost and that was very discouraging. The other fact: I had a major decrease in my milk supply when I tried to reduce my calories.

I wrote a post a few months ago about wanting to get back into fitness and that I wanted to lose some weight but that I obviously Logan was the priority and if I saw a cause and effect in my dieting and milk supply I would back off.

So I did.

I kept working out 4-5 times a week and I was still counting my calories. My priority was feeding Logan. I was disappointed I had to take a break from trying to lose weight but I reminded myself what my priority was at that moment. I came to terms with the fact that my weight loss goals would probably have to wait until I was done breastfeeding.

I started to write this post several months ago. Then we started getting sick. All.The.Time. Seriously–too many colds to count, bronchitis TWICE, sinus infection TWICE, freakin’ pink eye…! It felt like we’d never be well again. Everyone in our house was sick. I’d get back on track with the gym and get in one or two workouts and then I’d get sick AGAIN and take a week off from the gym.

For the last month I’ve been feeling pretty depressed. A big part of that is the constant illnesses. You just don’t feel good about yourself or life when you are sick. And exercise has always been a positive way that I relieve stress and improve my mood. Not being able to do that consistently has effected my moods more than anything, I think.

Waiting to lose weight has been a hard thing to reconcile in my mind, though. Especially since my “identity” has kind of been “the girl who lost 110 pounds” for so long.

Well, recently I’ve come to the realization that I think breastfeeding is coming to an end soon. My supply has dwindled to less than half of what it was. Logan is less interested in breastfeeding and I reached my goal of breastfeeding for 9 months. So starting in January I think I’m going to start slowly weaning and then focusing on my health and losing weight.

I won’t lie — I’m having a hard time with all of this. I’m struggling with the idea of quitting breastfeeding, even if it’s time. I’m feeling very emotional about all of that.

I’m also struggling with going back to being restrictive with my diet in order to lose weight. I thought those days were long over–and that I could easily lose weight doing what I’ve done for 10 years. But the reality is, I’m going to have to buckle down and cut my calories, say no to that second glass of wine, cut out sweets and stop eating old trigger foods (like pizza) in order to lose.

I’ve preached “eating in moderation” and not starving yourself for years and I plan on following my own advice. But I also need to stop making excuses for eating one more cookie or snacking on crap and not logging it. I need to be accountable to myself and honest. 

The day after Christmas, depressed about the photos of myself from the holiday (I mean really, should that have been my focus?? Or should I have been focusing on my baby’s first Christmas?) I stepped on the scale expecting the worst. It wasn’t too bad. I’d gained 3 pounds since the end of October. Basically–all the weight I managed to lose over the summer was back. I still have 20 pounds to lose.

So soon. Soon my body will be mine again and I can get serious about this 20 pounds.