Oct 232012
 

Sometimes I wonder if my blog would be more popular if I had been writing from the beginning of my weight loss journey, instead of starting at the end. Sometimes I wonder if my readers have a hard time relating to what I write about because I think many are just starting out on their own journey. It’s strange, I don’t know that I consider this a “weight loss” blog because I’m not trying to lose weight, and haven’t been for a few years. Instead, this site is about how I’ve kept the weight off, what has worked for me over the years, and also to illustrate that maintenance can be fun. I try to lead by example: continue healthy exercise, count my calories, eat whatever I want in moderation and live my life in a healthy way. My hope is that what I write inspires people to do what they are wanting to do: lose the weight.

So what happens after you lose the weight? Chances are, if you’ve lost a significant amount of weight, your life is very different NOW than it was THEN. Maybe you were a couch potato like me. Now you’re an adrenaline junkie who loves sports. Maybe you were used to eating crap food from a box in massive quantities like me. Now you’re into healthy, whole foods within an acceptable calorie range. Either way, you’re life and mine are very different after losing weight.

I think there are three stages. This is just my own experience and I’d love to hear from others who have reached goal weight.

The Honeymoon Stage

This is the best part about reaching goal weight. We get to feel JOY and satisfaction about reaching a big goal. We worked hard to lose that weight and finally seeing that number on the scale is an amazing feeling. There might be happy tears, cheers, and feelings of accomplishment.

The other part of this stage that is awesome is all the attention. During this period of time, I got so much attention from people: friends, family, coworkers I’d rarely interacted with came up to me and told me how great I look. It was such a nice ego boost. Especially after years of negative self-image and body hatred for being obese. My self-esteem was finally where it should have been all along. I wish it hadn’t taken 100 pounds lost to find that self esteem I should have had, but it definitely helped.

One of my favorite parts of reaching goal weight was the clothes. Sounds silly and shallow, right? Well, for a long time I wore really horrible clothes. I was too big to buy anything cute and 10 years ago, the plus sized options were few and far between. I tried to buy attractive plus sized clothing but in the end it was big jeans and big t-shirts I thought hid my weight problem. Losing 100 pounds opened up a whole new world for me. I was able to buy cute skirts and blouses that accentuated my curves and muscles.  I found that I loved shopping when I used to despise it. It was FUN. I was playing dress-up!

The Frustration Stage

This is the stage where reality sets in. It’s been awhile since reaching goal weight, people are used to the new YOU and as a result, you get less attention. I admit, I missed the attention I got from people because it was such a big ego boost. It always made me feel good when someone complimented my new body. This is where I learned to love my body without outside influence and compliments.

I was also at the weight I was going to be. I no longer got to experience that “oh my god I lost 3 pounds! YAY!” feelings because the scale never changed. (Which is good, don’t get me wrong.)

One of the ways I rewarded myself for losing weight was buying new clothes. I bought a new wardrobe almost monthly as I lost weight. I wasted a lot of money buying new sizes as I lost the weight, but it was still a good feeling being able to go down a size each time you shopped. Once I was at goal weight, I didn’t have to shop often and I kind of missed that reward system I’d set up for myself. It was something to look forward to each month.

The downside to losing a lot of weight: stretch marks and loose skin. Exercise helps that but it doesn’t prevent it or cure it entirely, unfortunately.

Finally, at the end of this stage I accepted that I was at goal weight and didn’t need to lose anymore (even those “last 5 pounds”) and I was faced with the question: What Now?

The Acceptance Stage

This is the stage I’ve been in for years now. It’s the “this is me, I’m starting to forget I was ever that old me” stage. Now, whenever I meet new people they know me as just Lisa. Not “the girl that lost 110 pounds.” Many people in my life now never knew me when I was 250 pounds. I still have a big group of friends that knew the “old me” but when new friends find out I used to be 100 pounds heavier, they are shocked. That’s still weird to me.

The best parts of this stage are the challenges I can do. I train and do things like the Portland Century, the Salem Metric Century, Hood to Coast and even simply going for long hikes. I get to do fun activities that I couldn’t do 100 pounds heavier.

A plus to this stage is that I rarely have to try on clothes. I know my size and I can grab it off the rack and wear it. That’s a really good feeling. And just like in the Honeymoon Stage, I still get to wear cute clothes!

This is the stage I hope to be in for the rest of my life. I’m sure there will be ups and downs but I’m going to do my best to maintain what I’ve lost. As a result, I have to eat less calories than I’d like to (don’t we all??) and I’m working on improving my relationship with food (something I’ll always work on, I suppose).

The real work starts now. Maintenance is sometimes harder than losing the weight. With maintenance, there is no finish line–no goal to work towards. The hard work is in staying on the plan that worked in the first place.

What happened to you after losing the weight?

Do you think there are stages of “after” weight loss? Where are you in that journey? Please share your experiences!

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Aug 152012
 

There have been a few times in my journey to healthy living where I recognized that I was having disordered thinking. The first time was when I was 250 pounds and I had given up on the idea of ever losing weight. I had resigned myself to always being obese, but part of me always thought “I’d be happy if I was skinny.” Of course, losing weight in itself didn’t make me “happy” but getting healthy certainly did.

Another time I recognized this disordered thinking pattern was when I was about 30 pounds away from reaching my goal weight. I had all this extra energy that I’d never had before and I hated to just sit still. If I had free time, I’d go work out. I was also sooo stuck. The scale was not budging. I hit a plateau that stuck around for so long it made me crazy. My solution? To work out every day. For 28 days straight, I worked out in some fashion–gym, swimming, running, walking. This was most definitely disordered thinking! Rest days are important for the body and the mind and I was clearly overtraining. This experience was the birth of my “two rest days a week no matter what” edict.

Fast forward to reaching my goal weight. I was happy, I felt accomplished and satisfied that I’d reached the goal of losing 100 pounds–and kept going! 110 pounds! I was so proud. Then I made the classic mistake: I stopped doing what worked to the lose the weight and thought I could maintain without counting my calories. Add a medication that causes weight gain to the mix and the scale steadily crept up. This time the disordered thinking was denial. I blamed the 15+ pounds on muscles, on training for Hood to Coast, on everything BUT my own behaviors.

Last year about this time I was getting a little obsessed with the scale. Too focused on what that number was. Thinking too much about those stupid ounces or pounds. Weighing too much. STOP. This is disordered. Walk away from the scale. Thus began my Scale-Free Summer which released me from the unhealthy patterns. It broke the habit of the scale, it made me more comfortable in my body and released me from the chains of unhealthy thinking.

I do not have this disordered thinking pattern 100% beat. If I had to guess I’d say it’s about 80%. Most of the time I am comfortable in my own skin, I am happy and content with my body as I maintain my weight loss, I am proud of losing 110 pounds. But every once in awhile, that disordered thinking starts to creep back into my brain…that little voice that says “I feel so fat.” (Note: Fat is NOT a feeling. I need to remind myself of this!)

Lately I’ve been looking at some photos of myself and thinking, “I don’t like how I look in that picture” or “I wish I didn’t have a muffin top.” I weigh the same as I’ve weighed for a long time now. So why is my brain playing tricks on me? Maybe it’s a control thing…there are things in my life that have happened recently that I cannot control and it sucks feeling like you can’t make decisions or go for your goals because you are waiting…waiting…limbo…But controlling food and exercise is not the area to remedy that.

Maybe I will never be 100% over it. But the most important thing to take away from this lesson is this:

I recognize when my thinking is disordered

and I put a stop to it.

Walk away from the scale, stop obsessing, think of something else, change the behavior when you recognize it happening. I need to celebrate my victories, recognize my non-scale victories, remind myself of what I have accomplished and the amazing things my fit body can do! It’s hard, it takes work and positive thinking, but it can work.

QUESTION: Can you recognize when you are slipping into disordered thinking and change it?

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