Food Psych

I recently started listening to a podcast called Food Psych. I heard about it from someone on Twitter and decided to check it out. It’s about intuitive eating, breaking out of diet culture, eating disorder recovery and Healthy at Every Size.

I’ve listened to about 10 episodes so far. They are long, a little over an hour or so. Each episode starts with a Q&A and then the rest of the episode is an interview with someone new each week, depending on the topic.

I am finding it very informative and interesting.

I learned that bulimia isn’t always about throwing up after eating. It can also mean a binge and then a strict restriction period to “make up for” the binge. I did not know that.

I also learned about orthorexia.

It was interesting to hear this term and learn more about it. Reflecting on my time blogging and reading “Healthy Living Blogs” for almost a decade now, I can see clearly that that whole “thing” was probably orthorexia. Focusing on diet culture, weight loss, over-exercising, being rigid about workout schedules and only eating “healthy foods.” There was a blogger that put a carrot in a hot dog bun instead of eating a hot dog, and a bunch of other truly bizarre (and disordered) things.

I was definitely part of this culture. It makes me think long and hard about my own journey. The podcast talks about how 90% of people who lose weight cannot keep it off. I guess I fall into this category? I lost 110 pounds and kept it off for over 10 years. I think that is pretty commendable. But at the same time, I maintained my weight by strict workout schedules and very low calorie intake. I don’t know that I fall into the eating disorder category per se, but definitely the diet culture category.

Something that happened recently: Logan has been telling me repeatedly lately that he’s hungry. This is after a meal, he had plenty of food during the meal. Michael and I have questioned if he was hungry or bored. We offer “you can have applesauce or a banana or some carrots” and of course he says no. He wants the crackers or granola bar.

This has been very triggering to me. First, I remember being a kid and wanting a snack and my mom would offer fruit or vegetables only. I grew up in a very strict food house, in the 90’s when it was the all low-fat/non-fat/no-sugar craze. So we didn’t get “treats” which lead to me bingeing later.

So hearing my son tell me he’s hungry and he wants to have a sweet treat, is triggering. Michael and I have been very conscious about letting him be intuitive, not being strict with food. We don’t want him to grow up with body issues/food issues etc. I especially don’t want that because I know how it feels and what it leads to.

But here I am, Saturday afternoon when Logan has had some crackers and raisins as a snack (with watered down apple juice to drink) and he’s whining that he’s hungry and I feel MY food issues pop up and I am mixed: do I restrict him? Do I give in and potentially create not healthy eating habits?

Boys can have eating disorders, too. It’s not just girls, even if it USUALLY is girls. I don’t want Logan to grow up like I did. I don’t want him to have body shame, or become obese, etc. It’s a hard balance for me, especially since I am still trying to come to terms with my own food issues.

At one of Logan’s recent “well baby” check up appointments with his doctor, whom I REALLY liked, gave me pause. She weighed him and stuff and suggested we “monitor” his weight. I was flabbergasted. Logan has been in the 97% percentile for height his entire life. 95% sure he will be a very tall boy (my brother is 6’6) because there are a lot of tall men in both sides of the family. His weight was around the 50% percentile, as it has been his whole life as well. I didn’t question the doctor, partly because I was so surprised she even mentioned my toddler’s weight. But I left feeling like “WTF”. Logan is tall and skinny as a rail. His clothes in his size are always a little too big.

This was the first experience as a parent of “Body shaming” my kid. It stuck with me for months. And listening to Food Psych Podcast, I am hearing in these interviews of people who had their body and food issues start at a VERY young age. Like ME. I was 9 when I suddenly realized there was something “Wrong” with my body. (I was not fat in anyway, but I THOUGHT I was.)

I’m working through a lot of things right now, thinking about stuff. But I wanted to pass on the info about the podcast because I am really enjoying it and I think a lot of people will too.

Keto Meals Week 1

Here is the first week in meals. Everything I ate (100%):

Day One

Breakfast – Cheese omelet with sausage on the side. Unsweetened iced tea. Coffee with nutpod creamer.

Lunch  – SkinnyTaste’s Picadillo on salad with avocado

Snacks – Walnuts, Olives stuffed with jalapenos, Cheese

Dinner – Turkey Burger with Smoked Gouda Cheese, Bacon, Mayo. I made a cucumber salad with avocado and Newman’s Own Lite Italian Dressing (low carb and no sugar! Yay!) and a glass of red wine.

How I felt & how I did- Felt good! Wasn’t hungry! Like not at all! Didn’t feel tired or run down, either. I even worked out. My macros were great! I was pretty close on all the macros, not perfect, but that’s ok. The important part was I got to 20 net carbs. Yay me!

Day Two

Breakfast – 2 scrambled eggs (with heavy cream), with sausage and red peppers topped with cheese and sour cream and hot sauce. Coffee with heavy cream and nutpod creamer. Unsweetened iced tea.

Lunch – Antipasto Salad. Green salad with Italian dressing. Salami, prosciutto, fresh mozzarella, cucumber, Greek peperoncinos and olives.

Dinner – This was the first challenge–going out to a restaurant. I could have changed our start date so that we began the Keto diet after our dinner plans with friends, but I wanted to be able to make this work even going out. We met our friends at Hopworks (basically a beer and pizza place but it’s kid friendly). I got a Cobb Salad (salad with blue cheese dressing, blue cheese crumbles, tomatoes, bacon, avocado, hard boiled egg). It came with a breadstick, which I did not eat but wanted to!

I did have a glass of wine but just one.

Overall, my second day was good. I was MUCH closer to my macro goals (67% out of 70% of fat, 23% out of 25% on protein) but today I was at 27 net carbs for the day, so over. Looking over my day I discovered that my highest carb count was the avocado–ironically–but that’s ok because it’s the good carbs. (I mean HOW is the avocado higher in carbs than my WINE?!?!)

But I worked out today, so maybe the few extra carbs were a good thing?

Day Three

Breakfast – Omelet with cheese and bacon and hot sauce. Unsweetened iced tea and coffee with heavy cream and Stevia. Still not quite the same as my coffee creamer. WAHHHHH!!!! 🙁

Lunch – I got home from swimming feeling the first effects of the coming Keto-flu (I think). I was weak and shaky and felt like my muscles didn’t work. I had steamed broccoli with Goddess Dressing and some pork rinds (which are kinda weird but good if you are craving chips). Then I had a “wrap”–two slices of turkey and salami and a slice of prosciutto wrapped around a hunk of fresh mozzarella with mayo and mustard.

Snacks – Today I had a mug of bone broth. It was good! Warm and filling. I also had a piece of cheese and, some nuts and some olives.

Dinner – Michael made pastrami on the traeger grill! It was a week long process, too! But it was cool to have homemade pastrami for dinner and we have a ton for lunches for the week. Dinner was pastrami in a low carb wrap with mayo and lettuce. It was really good!

Day Four

Breakfast – Scrambled eggs (with heavy cream) with red peppers and sausage topped with some shredded cheese. Unsweetened iced tea. I had coffee with heavy cream and Stevia when I got to work.

Lunch – Pastrami in a low carb wrap! These wraps are really great! Not only are they actually tasty but they are low in calories and low in carbs. They are only 5 net carbs. So I made a wrap with mayo, mustard, pastrami, some lettuce and cheese. Bone broth.

Snacks – I made ranch dip from scratch (Hidden Valley packet with Tillamook full fat sour cream) and had raw broccoli and cucumber. Then later I had mixed salted nuts and a piece of cheese.

Dinner – Zoodles with pesto and meatballs. Some mozzarella on the side.

Day Five

Breakfast – Cheese omelet with hot sauce. Unsweetened iced tea. Coffee with heavy cream and stevia.

Lunch – Pastrami (no wrap), avocado, mozzarella, Newman’s Own Lite Italian dressing.

Snacks – Mixed salted nuts (only 1 ounce this time), cheese in the morning. In the afternoon I had homemade ranch dip with cucumbers and broccoli.

Dinner – Pork chop with herbed butter sauce and shaved brussels sprouts.

My Take Away From Week One

  • It is actually a lot harder to get fat in your diet than you think.
  • I’m going to miss my Kombucha. 🙁
  • I have a lot more thoughts and working on a post for next week!